I Did Gain Weight. Thanks for Noticing!

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I don’t know when it became normal to comment on someone’s weight. There was a time where I’d lost about 60 pounds and kept it all off for almost 4 years. Due to stress from working on my senior collection, I gained a lot of it back during my final year of college. When I saw people after the fact (always women, always older than me), they would often say: “Hi, how are you? Congratulations on graduating. Wow, you’ve gained weight!” If they were particularly bold, they would follow up with “What happened?” My response was always that stupid giggle we all do when we don’t really know how to answer, followed by a sting of pain from my feelings being hurt.

“I did, and it looks like you did too!”

Just so we’re all on the same page: IT IS RUDE TO COMMENT ON SOMEONE’S WEIGHT. Do you really think they didn’t notice they had to buy bigger clothes before you decided to point it out to them? Don’t you notice if you gain a few pounds? You do not know what is going on in their life to cause that weight gain, or weight loss for that matter. Not only does it make that person self-conscious, but it also makes them not want to be around you anymore. Another thing, don’t ask a stranger when they are due. I’ve seen that one go left too many times. Nobody owes you an explanation regarding their body.

I’ve come up with a couple responses to that comment. If I’m in a good mood, I’ll say “I did. Thanks for noticing.” If I’m feeling petty, “I did, and it looks like you did too!” followed by a smile. That way, it makes them feel awkward for bringing it up and hopefully they won’t do it to someone else. Don’t forget that it is also OK to tell people your weight is not up for discussion.  For the readers that are guilty of make these types of comments, I highly encourage you to stop. Maybe your intention isn’t to be hurtful, but it is. If you absolutely must make it known that someone has gained weight, have some decency and say it behind their back. Just know, either way, you’re a jerk.

 

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